Thursday, November 5, 2009

Sexism- Country Style

I know I've written about my husband's version of craigslist before, you know the park your junk on the lawn with a spray painted sign next to it kind of advertising. And without surprise we are once again hawking some rusty metal in our front yard. This time it's a skid steer, which is one of those little caged machines on wheels with a bucket in front (description for my less farm-y readers).

Last Saturday the Gardener was playing around on Google maps and realized that street view had come to our country road. As we waited for the photo to load we were both wondering what the photo would look like. Was it summer; can you see the garden? Before or after we painted? Dogs barking at the Google guy??? As the photo came in to focus I was torn between laughing and throwing something at my husband. On the lawn in front of our house (for all of the Internet to see) was a crappy old minivan. Seriously, we have turned into those people. Really though I shouldn't be surprised. I will say though that the Gardener is quite orderly otherwise. He doesn't keep any junk outside and always put away his toys, so there's that.

Anyhow I'm getting off topic here and the kids (half day of school) are hounding me to start a craft. Flash forward to today. A car pulls into our driveway and a man steps out with a big framed photo in his hand. I quickly run out the back door to catch him before he rings the doorbell and alerts my dogs that holy shit there's a stranger here, we must bark as loudly as possible and freak the hell out.! Nevermind that Oliver was laying outside and never heard the guy pull in the driveway or close the car door, only started making a scene once I was already talking to the guy. The man is an aerial photographer (basically he has one of the parachute fan planes and a camera) who takes photos of farms and then tries to sell them door to door. An older guy, white beard, didn't set off any creepy alarms in me, plus when I'm standing next to a 140 pound St. Bernard I feel quite safe. He shows me the photo and I say "Oh, that's nice." He just looks at me. I say "Very nice." He looks at me and says "I can come back when your husband is home." Sort of annoyed because he won't talk to me, I say "So what's the deal?" as I point to the the big framed photo of our house, barns and outbuildings taking note of the lack of any crap cars or tractors out for sale. He replies, "59 with the oak frame." And just the print? "39" Before I can even say anything he says, "Well I'll come back another time when your husband is around." Thanks a lot A-hole, you just blew a sale. It wasn't even his intentional (or unintentional, I don't know) sexist remarks... at first, but his idea that my husband would be the better person to talk to about buying his art. My husband has an appreciation (although limited) for art but only if it doesn't cost him anything. He has even less patience for people coming to the house trying to get some of his hard earned money. While this falls into a different category than the religious types that come around spreading the word and the fidgety woman trying to sell homeschooling materials to us over the summer, but still he wouldn't be interested.

In a world where women are now as powerful and influential as men, why do some people still think that a man should be the one calling the shots especially when it comes to money? My husband doesn't manage our finances. He doesn't even have a debit card linked to our bank account. If he needs money, he asks me. We both prefer it this way. I have the time to manage the checking account (Remember I'm just a house wife and don't work. What the 2 nights a week milking cows count as a job? Huh.) and more so the patience to deal with sorting through bills and sitting on hold when I realize that our health care provider screwed up yet another bill. But the authority to buy a photo? Absolutely not.


Kelly said...


Momma Bear said...

I LOVE this post. This has been on my mind for a while and especially the last week.
Even though I own the mini van and I'm the one that was in the car accident and I'm the one that filled out all of the paperwork at every point,police report, insurance, body shop. Everyone that has called has referenced Jason, my husband. It pisses me off so bad!! Ahh man it just chaps my ass I tell you. WTF!!

sheila said...

Oh, that pisses me off! When people do that to me? I (cocky like) tell them...yes, they can wait for my husband, but if they want money they'll have to deal with me. That normally takes care of that, lol.

As for the minivan in the front? lol!!! I once saw a drunk guy passed out on a curb in one google map.

Riot Kitty said...

Amen, sister! I do the finances in our house, and the same thing applies with the debit card. Mr. RK is so absent minded he doesn't even trust himself with a checkbook!

LL Cool Joe said...

That sickens me. As you know, I have pretty strong views on gender stereotyping of any kind, and this a damn good example of it.

When we get to the stage where we just see a person and not their gender?

Great post.

Wild Child said...

Same people who gave Mr. Wild the skunk eye for staying at home with his kids.

rachel... said...

I would have been irritated, too, but I'm a little embarrassed to admit that I've used the excuse that my husband isn't home more than once to get rid of salesmen and telemarketers. If he does come back, I hope you tell him exactly why he lost the sale.

Interestingly, the word verification is: wifed

Christana said...

I always find this entertaining. Eric virtually NEVER trusts himself to spend money without talking to me. I'm the one that does all the bills, the checking account and manages our rental property. I've also used the line "You can talk to him, but if you want money you'll need to talk to me." Ah, the 21st century.

Out in Them Sticks said...

i'd love to have given him a good slap!